My take on “woo woo”

I’ll start this off by saying, even I’ve been taken in by my share of woo in the past. What is woo woo, you ask? It’s pseudoscience “medicine,” often encouraged by completely unqualified people, aka anything Goop recommends. Why am I addressing this now? A very lovely instagrammer I follow was recently raving about the new woo book she’s following.

So, let’s take a look at this. First, homeopathy has been proven to be worthless. It’s a way to part the easily fooled with their money. No, something diluted to 1 millionth of its parts isn’t going to heal or cure you of anything. Second, when the FDA outlaws something like bitter almond, it is because such a thing could kill you. Bitter almond does not cure cancer and cyanide poisoning is a pretty unpleasant way to die.

I could go on and on with some of the claims that woo woo hacks promote (ladies, don’t stick jade up your lady bits, I mean, unless that’s how you get off). The book that prompted me to write this is Liver Rescue by the Medical Medium. It’s a book written by someone with zero medical training but claims to commune with ghosts to tell you how to live your best life by cleaning up your “sluggish liver.” There’s no such medical diagnosis as “sluggish liver.” If your liver isn’t functioning properly, you’ll know it. The resulting condition is called jaundice. Your eyes and skin turn yellow. Alcoholics often end up with fatty liver, which is a true medical condition, and can be healed over time by quitting drinking and eating healthy. Otherwise, your liver is doing just fine.

There is also no such medical diagnosis as “adrenal fatigue.” I’ve had conversations with real medical doctors (you know, those folks who go to school forever to learn how to save lives. You can identify them by the MD they earned) about adrenal fatigue, because as I said, I too have fallen prey to woo hockers before. Your adrenal glands are doing fine and if they aren’t, you will end up with real medical conditions, such as Cushing’s or Addison’s. The world’s largest organization of endocrinologists has flatly stated, adrenal fatigue doesn’t exist. However, woo woo folks, like the Medical Medium will tell you it does and then they’ll try to sell you a bunch of supplements to fix it.

That’s the big thing these folks are doing: they’ll sell you a book full of pseudoscience that is often contradictory within its pages and then they’ll sell you the “cure” for these false ailments. It would be great if this was all true. It sounds so easy- pop a pill and follow their advice and presto! You’re well and will never get heart disease or cancer. Except it’s not that easy.

Yes, the diets they recommend are often pretty good. Woo hockers often promote healthy diets full of fruits and vegetables, though they often combine those with “detoxes” to help whatever organ they are claiming is malfunctioning. While fasting for brief periods of time has been shown through peer reviewed medical research to have some health benefits, the same cannot be said for most so-called “detoxes.” Your kidneys and liver are detoxing your body every moment of the day. It’s why they exist. However, starving yourself or drinking nothing but lemon water for two weeks straight can have serious adverse affects. Your body needs sustenance!

So, yes, sometimes the diet guidelines they provide are good, but that can be said of any diet low in unhealthy fats, low in sugar, and full of fiber. However, paleo diets as prescribed by some woo hockers is a quick road to cardiovascular disease, and the keto diet is harmful to your kidneys over the long term. You’re far better off going vegetarian or vegan, if that’s what you’re down for. What the science says so far is that, unless you have celiac disease, gluten is perfectly fine, and meat consumption in moderation is also healthy. From what I’ve read, dairy, while delicious, is best set aside. However, most of us aren’t giving up our cheese.

My main point in all of this is not to be taken in by every charlatan promising you health and long lasting beauty by buying what they’re selling. Medicine has made great strides in figuring out how to live a healthy life. Don’t smoke, don’t drink alcohol in excess, and limit fat and sugar intake. Most supplements on the market are simply an easy way to take your money. However, some, such as N-Acetyl Cysteine, have been proven to have some efficacy. If you’re eating a healthy diet full of vegetables, you probably don’t even need a daily vitamin, though I’ll admit, I take one and I’m not giving it up.

While I appreciate the instagrammer who inspired me to write this, she’s often touting quite a bit of pseudoscience that wealthy white women can indulge in without worry, such as detoxes or new exercise fads claiming to completely heal your body of everything wrong with it. However, many of us don’t have all day to spend preparing everything we eat from scratch and then spend all day long eating tiny bits to get the nutrients we need to survive. That is a luxury for the wealthy who then cause fear in the not-so-wealthy that they’re going to die if they don’t spend their hard earned money on such fads.

Most of us are hard-working busy people, especially us women who not only have to work full-time but also carry the majority of the emotional and mental load for keeping our households running. Real advice, as touted by medical doctors everywhere, is to eat healthy, take medicine you need to control real medical conditions- like antidepressants for those with depression or anxiety, etc, get your yearly checkups, get your vaccines (because it has been proven over and over again that there is zero correlation between autism and vaccines), and get some exercise. Yes, a healthy diet can help you control or heal your diabetes but your doctor has been telling you that from the beginning. You don’t need someone communing with ghosts to tell you that. Yes, a healthy diet can heal heart disease. Yes, giving up alcohol can help heal fatty liver disease (a real and diagnosable medical condition). All of that information is free to you via the internet.

When someone is trying to sell you something that medical science has already deemed dangerous or proven not to work, you need to wonder why and usually that answer is: they want your money. Gwyneth Paltrow is not a doctor. She’s a very lovely looking actress who has been hoodwinked by woo practitioners. Jenny McCarthy is not a doctor. She’s just a person who read a paper that has long been debunked and her spreading of misinformation has led to children dying from the measles, an easily preventable disease. Anyone claiming to be communing with the dead to tell you your health status and then sell you the cure, is basically a snake oil salesman in nicer clothes.

Thanks for listening to my rant. If you want to hear someone far more entertaining than I tell you many of these similar things, I highly recommend Tim Minchin’s Storm. It’s ten minutes of brilliance on this same topic.

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