The world is a bit surreal right now.
Today, I had to tell my father that his little girl will die soon and then explain the time line of what will happen.
I explained to my teenaged sister why there’s nothing more the hospital can do for our sister.
I had to try on my funeral dress to see if it still fit after not having to wear it for 7 or so years.
I cried, regained my composure, cried again, kept busy, cried some more…
Mostly I’m numb. I’ve kept busy and moving because the alternative is hard to imagine.
This has been coming for over two years but it feels too soon and I thought there was more time.
I’m not ready for this.
My sister will die within days.
How are you ever ready for that?
It’s never easy to let go of someone who you hold near and dear to your heart. I’m with you I’ve cried, did something’s to take my mind off of it and cried again then got angry at my child’s significant other because of the way they are acting over monitary things they don’t have or can’t meet their daily household bills and take it out on those who are closest to them. I was like really be glad you have what you have because no one is guaranteed tomorrow “stop being so petty” and thank god for what you do have. Just know that I’m always here for you if you want to talk or what ever. I love you honey.