“Get your life in order”

I know it has been a while since I’ve posted anything but life has been super crazy. We went to Las Vegas (and I wrote a long post about it that then a computer glitch destroyed… so it will be reposted once I have the time to sit down and reconstruct it) then we went to Florida for Thanksgiving to be with my family. It was a long drive to make for a few short days but we knew it was important and it was really fun. Whereas Vegas was rushing to and fro, Florida was relaxing. We enjoyed a long walk on the beach together plus time running in my childhood neighborhood and just hanging out with the family and eating lots of food. We even came home with lots of good beer that we can’t get in Nashville. Score!

We’ve also been focused on our first Christmas together and lots of planning going on behind the scenes for big things to come in the new year. K and I are excited to make 2014 the best year yet! I don’t doubt we will succeed but as of yesterday, we received sobering news.

My sister’s cancer treatment did not work. The tumors spread into her lungs and further, nearing her brain. As this was the last hope for a cure, the doctor told her to get her life in order. What words to hear! We are reeling from this news as a family and trying to figure out our course of action for the near future. We are also trying to ensure the children have a great Christmas, given the circumstances.

I can hardly get into my feelings and thoughts about all of this right now. It is too fresh and it is hard to say the words that are the truth. For now, I know that my sister’s time is limited. How limited is uncertain. 31 seems like such a young age to face leaving your children and your family, to give up all the plans and dreams you had for your future. Instead, I’m going to focus on what can be done in the time that remains for her.

If you are sitting there wondering if you can help in some way, I have only a few suggestions.

• Offer to spend time with anyone in this family (if you know us). Whether it means we talk about it or not or whether we cry or not, time with friends and loved ones helps.
• Donate to Chelsea’s Give Forward fundraiser. Cancer is an expensive disease and with the future being uncertain, sadly hard cash is a balm in these times.
• Send the family food. Just as when new babies come or after funerals, these times make it difficult to focus on meals and shopping. There are online means of shipping a meal (Take Them a Meal is a good option) or if you are a close friend in Florida, please feel free to drop one by. Sending a gift card to Publix would also be helpful.
• Donate gifts or gift cards for the children. I hate to say this because it hurts my heart, but this may be the last Christmas they have with their mother and no, no amount of toys or gifts will help that, but, as my mother is supporting her household plus my sister and her children, one income only goes so far and the children are growing tall and strong, so things such as clothes and new bicycles, etc, become important.

It is hard to think of other things but consider all the actions you take when someone passes away or when a baby is born… what do you do and bring to the family then? This is not much different.

I am already blown away by the generosity of people through this time…as I face something I never even considered possible. I spent my life expecting my little sister to be beside me into old age but time is not promised to any of us. This is a reminder to cherish your time and cherish your loved ones while you can.